I have been wanting to blog for so long because there is so much to write about, but it just hasn't happened. I'm feeling very spoiled and very ungrateful at the moment, and I'm really struggling with it. Spring is always hard on me-I always love it, St. Patricks Day, all the birthdays, and Easter, but the barometric pressure changes due to roaming thunderstorms kill my joints (yes, I'm an old lady who did too much ballet for her own good), and the allergies come in with full force. Which means for me a sore grump with a non stop sinus headache and post nasal drip. This is also typically when I suffer my burn out for the year, and unfortunately this year is no different. Christmas is never a relaxing time for us, particularly when I'm working in retail so instead of going into the new year well rested, or really rested at all it feels like we just got done running a marathon just to begin a new one. And poor Jon...oh I ache for him! School is going to end his life! He is desperately trying to survive these last 3 classes...he told me he doesn't want a birthday party this year-but he wants to save and have a HUGE and crazy Graduation party. I agreed wholeheartedly. So I am out working my 40 a week trying to hang out with Paisley as much as I can, he is in working his 20-40, school, and taking care of Paisley most of the time and we are barely surviving. I feel like I've been in survival mode since I went back to work. I just want to cook, clean, repair, hang out with my child and be a housewife! I shouldn't feel so picked on that I just have to work right now in order for us to survive, but leaving her lately has been so hard. And she keeps growing. She's going to crawl and I'm going to be at work, and she's going to walk and I'm going to be at work, and it makes me cry. a lot. And I know, how spoiled are we that Jon gets to be the one home with her, and I love my job. If I could choose anything that took me away from my baby, at least it's something I love as much as Bath & Body Works. But its just hard. I don't know if all you housewives out there know how blessed you are. We've tried to survive off of what Jon makes, and we just can't. Hopefully someday soon we can. I don't mind being poor, but I do mind living off the government, and currently that is what we would have to do. I hate being judged because I'm working and on top of it working Sundays, but at the same time I can't feel good about staying home and living off everyone else. All of this has been rattling around in the back of my mind, which doesn't help the sinus headache. Sorry I'm a downer. I need to get past this point and things will be better. I just can't wait til jons done with school...oh what a beautiful day that will be.


  1. Girl, don't be concerning yourself with what other people think of your work habits. You are doing what is necessary for your family, and that is amazing. You are so strong all of the time that I think you have every right to be a downer every now and then. So whine away, my dear! I heart you still ;-)

  2. Hey cuz, I totally know where you're coming from! We are sooo in the same place. My poor Royce works 40hrs and goes to school, I'm in full time and I won't graduate for another year and a half! Our poor kids are stuck in the car for 1 hr plus a day, and we don't see them for more than the 3 or 4 waking hours they aren't in school/daycare. I don't like living off the government either, but some day I will pay gobs of taxes and give them their money back. This is the best we can do, so don't worry about it, just keep working your way out!

  3. Oh April! It sounds like you are havng a real hard time. :( I'm so sorry. The good new is one day you will be able to stay at home with your darling little girl and this "trial will be but a short moment". Hang in there honey!

  4. Hang in there...Jon is SO close to being done! And remember that if you need ANYTHING Steve and I are always here to lend a hand...SERIOUSLY! Just call US!!

  5. I do know I'm lucky - I promise. (:

    I'm so sorry that you have to miss those moments. Keep praying for a change, saving your pennies, paying off debts, and smiling through it. I know the day will come that you can hang out with Paisley all day, every day.

    You're a great Mom, by the way. Don't even let the guilt stuff come into play.


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