{growing up}: ?

Ok, so I really could have spent a little bit more time on this diagram, but it shows my point and I'm all about doing the bare minimum when it comes to these sorts of things...
Jon and I had a lengthy discussion on the car drive home from Salt Lake about aging.  We're in a weird place...he's 30, I'm 27 and we both still want to believe that we're 21.  We did so much in our young adulthood, before we had kids, but of course there is always more we could have done.  We're in this strange inbetween where we're certainly not middle aged and completely beaten down by children, but we're also not able to take off chasing a VW bus across the country or off to Mexico to camp for a week.  We find ourselves trying to be responsible, worried about politics and discussing the future of our world and country while also wondering if we could find someone to babysit while we went to warped tour and at what point do we stop trying to be trendy?
Jon painted a picture of one of the best analogy's that I've every heard on the subject.  And I know this isn't anything new, but aging shouldn't be painted as crossing a map.  You aren't moving from one point to another-leaving that piece of you behind as you go.  Instead we are more like a ball of wax-growing and developing as we age-taking every piece of ourselves with us as we progress.  I didn't leave my love for obnoxious punk music and snowboarding in my teenage years.  My ridiculously loud manual transmission car is a souvenir from young adulthood that I really don't want to part with!  And I will always love fried chicken and chocolate milk-just like I did when I was 6.
Sometimes it's hard to find balance.  It was funny-towards the end of both pregnancies I got a little weird.  I start listening to music from high school and wanting more than anything to be back there.  I think I freak out a little at where life is taking me-being a Mom is this crazy responsibly and I miss the simplicity of only looking out for myself.  But then when I sit down for even a moment to think about it I would never go back...I love my life, my hubby and my babies too much.
Jon reminded me that I don't have to give up everything from my past lives-just continue to grow and mold it into where I am now.  And that's what I try to do.  I take silly pictures with silly girls, drive my loud car, play at the park with my babies, cliff jump at the lake, and enjoy chocolate milk.


  1. ...And I took my oldest to a Bob Dylan concert for her 18th birthday and the Hunky Hubs is taking number one son to Phish this weekend. We evolve, but somehow never lose who we are...


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