{infirmities}: day 4

Right now I am on a mission to cure my allergies-not just treat them with meds.  I am under the impression that it's possible to cure them-I have read a lot about it and I believe it's possible, I just need to find out what's going to work for me. 

Currently I have invested in a neti pot.  While it is not a complete fix, it does seem to be helping.  I also am drinking 1/8 C of Apple Cider Vinegar once a day.  It is nasty, and the worst thing ever to ingest!!  It also may be helping.  I'm also taking Las Vegas Allergy Mix drops under the tongue.  They're basically a homeopathic method-they're supposed to help me build up an immunity to the things that I'm allergic to. 

I believe I'm a good candidate for building up an immunity to things because I'm not allergic to my cat.  I am allergic to every other cat I come across-indoor or outdoor-to the point that I break out into hives, but I am no longer allergic to my own.  I feel like there is some significance to this.

So I appreciate all the suggestions for medication-but I really have tried them all with zero results.  I wouldn't be in this state if they hadn't stopped working.  (And yes, I have tried ALL of them-I've had allergies my entire life, believe me I have)   And really I want to try and get away from treating allergies solely with meds SO that next time I'm pregnant or nursing I still have something I can do. 

Luckily something I'm doing is beginning to work, so I'll keep posting on progress because I'm really excited that I may have found a cure!  (at least for me ;))

{infirmities}: spring

I'm beginning to feel like this is becoming a tradition...every year spring hits and every year I get really sick every 2-3 weeks.  I'm done.  I quit.  The worst part?  Paisley has allergies too.  For the last 3 nights she has whimpered all night long in her sleep and all day long in her awake-she's teething on top of it, and to make matters worse, has a killer black eye that has to be contributing to her headache:

(these are from Jon's cell phone so they aren't the best...)  She also went ahead and found the food coloring yesterday and she now has one pink hand and one blue hand.
If any of you have ANY suggestions for allergies, I need them.  I am dying.  For reals this time.  It's really, really bad.  I took Nyquil and it didn't even touch them!  It's bad!  Since none of the normal medicine is working I have been trying a neti pot, the Las Vegas allergy mix drops under the tongue, apple cider vinegar, and I'm trying to get my hands on more local honey-I don't think I was taking enough of it regularly enough. 
I'm tired of being sick every couple of weeks...I don't know what I need to do.  I've really been eating healthier, exercising and taking vitamins more regularly...my sleep schedule has been better...IDK!!!  Any and all advice is welcome...and hopefully one day soon I will stop whining!

{update}: a couple things...

I feel like I need to update but there hasn't been any huge event happening so I just haven't written...I guess there are a couple things:

• Paisley currently has an awesome black eye.  Pictures and story are coming soon.  She is busier than ever...she's supposed to be napping right now and I can hear her talking to herself and giggling...I can't decide if it's time to go down to one nap a day-but I really don't want to give up the 2 nap routine!!  She is trying words more and more everyday, but her solid go-to words are still uh-oh, shoes, and cheese.  She has started kissing everyone on the mouth, which is actually really cute and is getting more and more mischievous every day.
• Jon went down to the drag races in Vegas last Friday:

• As you can see they went all out classy and sported handle-bar moustaches and baseball caps.  They came home sunburned and all hyped up on testosterone from watching the crazy fast cars.
• I am dying with allergies.  I don't know what to do.  I'm going to go get some local honey today and start drinking it like mad.  I've heard that the honey really helps-and I've always tried to buy local in the past.  It just didn't dawn on me to take it everyday like a medicine.  We'll see if it works...
• I have been super busy with Spring pictures-I love it, but I haven't been this busy in awhile and it is crazy!!  I'm so excited-I've got 2 weddings coming up in a month and it's going to be a lot of fun!
• I have been reading the Work and the Glory.  If you haven't read this series, you should.  I've always wanted to get to know the early church better-and this is the perfect way to do it.  While the main family that you follow in the book is fictional, everyone else is not and it has helped me get to know the early members of the church, and more importantly, I feel like I'm finally getting to know the Prophet Joseph Smith.  The only consequences of reading the series is that I'm constantly on edge.  Being a Member of the Church at the time of the books was very dangerous and I have to keep reminding myself that I don't live in Missouri during the extermination order and that mobs are not going to come drive me out of my house.  There was so much heartbreak for those early saints and sometimes it is really hard to read all of the terrible things that happened to them.  It's no wonder that they came here!!
• Conference was awesome.  As always. 

I think that about wraps it up...I'm hoping to post more pics from California soon!!  We had such a nice little break for our anniversary...♥

{love}: jon

I didn't have the chance to write on our anniversary, so I'm a bit late-but I still wanted to write.  Califonia was wonderful.  I love this man so much.  We celebrated 6 years of marriage on the 12th of March-and we still like each other!! 

After a short trip home to Idaho Falls, I realized how much safety and happiness I have in marraige.  Really, how much safety and love I have with Jon.

High School was tumultuous, college was crazy fun and lonely-full of heartbreak and angst.  This sweet kid who had no idea what he was getting himself into rescued me-drowning in an ocean of hard emotional issues and filled me with light and love.  We rescued each other.  We've healed each other.  He is my happiness, my love and my very best friend and I can't think of a greater blessing in my life than him.  I love him so much-with warmth and safety that grows more every day.

i love you poo muffin.

{valentines}: 80's prom!!

It seems like this was so long ago-but I'm only a month behind, right?  This was such a fun night!!  Hopefully next year everyone isn't sick again!! Happy Valentines ♥

{breakthrough}: running

I think I may have had a breakthrough.  The headaches have finally stopped-I worked up all the energy to complain about them and the next day I woke up headache free.  And then the day after that too...maybe I just needed to complain?  I talked to my Doc about having my tonsils removed and I think that may be a route I might take...but I'm going to wait until we HAVE to pay our deductible for me and then I'll do it.  In the meantime I am going to look into a neti-pot or other sinus cleansing device and see if that helps...and I'm enjoying the wonders of modern medicine and taking Chlortab.  It doesn't always work, but it's better than nothing and should help me manage for the season. 

After months of working out I am finally enjoying the energizing feeling that is supposed to accompany exercise.  I know I've been sick, so that's zapped my energy but previous to the sickness I would just work out and then need to lay low for the rest of the day because I was exhausted.  I tried doing Insanity back in January-and I went strong for 3 weeks and finally decided I really needed the energy to function.  I've been doing Zumba at least once a week and I LOVE it. 

I've put off running because I just wanted to be able to say that I did it this time without running.  I finally broke and went running last night.  There is something exhilirating about dressing up like a dude and jogging at night.  I just kept my head down with my baseball cap on and hood up and no one got in my way.  Jon was funny because he didn't know how to tell me nicely that I very successfully look like a guy when I want to.  It is one of the perks of being a big, tall girl.  Running used to be a therapy for me-I learned to love it after high school and I'm not sure why I gave it up.  Honestly I would rather do Zumba or swim or dance, but nothing beats how easy it is to put on some headphones and run.  Surprisingly I made it the full 2 miles without too much trouble (the route I take is half uphill, half downhill) and the downhill sure did help. 

I expected to wake up the same way I have when I push like I did-exhausted and sore, but I woke up feeling pretty good.  I went to Zumba this morning and I can honestly say I feel nothing but awesome.  I'm tired-don't get me wrong, but I'm not dead like I've been.  I'm almost afraid to say anything aloud because I don't want to jinx it-but I'm hoping that this battle I've been fighting with exercise is over and that I can now start enjoying it again. 

Now if I could just muster up what I need to wage some war against sugar...

{whine}: diagnose me

I can't decide if I need to seek medical help or not.  I don't know if I just have the lingering infection from the Broncitis, or if it's just the weather, or allergies, or everything combined...I don't know.  My complaints:

• I wake up every morning with a pounding headache.  It roams so I can't pinpoint it to a specific spot-sometimes its in the back, sometimes in the front.  Tylenol is effective for about 4 hours-but it wears off and my head starts pounding again.
• I also wake up with a neck/shoulder ache as well.
• I'm all stuffy because of allergies.  Ug.  I've started snoring worse which is keeping Jon up and I don't think I'm sleeping as well either.
• I'm tired.  Always.  I have really tried my best to be more active, or get more sleep, or relax more-nothing.  There is no difference if I go to bed at 10, or if I go to bed at 2-I feel the same!!
• I still don't have my full lung capacity.  My lungs are all goopey, making Zumba and other exercise rough.
• I've lost almost all drive to do anything.  Normally I care that my house is a mess and such but I just don't have the energy to do anything about it!  I've really tried to force myself to get out and do stuff so I don't feel so awful but it's not helping...

Almost every Spring I go through a mild depression but I really am not depressed.  I'm happy mentally, but my body is sad right now... For the last 4-5 days or so I've just been loading up on Ibprofen and Tylenol and taking some allergy meds and I can at least fake it, but I'm tired of doing that too!!  For headaches I hesitate to go to a traditional doc because I don't really want to be medicated-but at the same time if it is a lingering infection then that could be super bad too!!  I just don't know what's wrong with me!!

{update}: paisley

It's been awhile since I blogged about Miss Paisley.  I love her.  We have so much fun.  I think I've been wanting to hibernate lately-I don't know if it's allergies coming on or if I'm still just getting rid of the Broncitis but the more tired and unmotivated I am, the more Paisley just wants to be a busy.  I think spring and life have hit her and she is a BUSY BODY. 
About 2 weeks ago marked 18 months for her-which is still so crazy to me because Jon and I still look at each other sometimes and wonder where she came from?  Some fun new things that she recently began doing include:

• Using "uh-oh" as the universal term for-"I need help" to "I'm doing something I know I'm not supposed to"  Yesterday she stood at the bottom of the stairs pointing up and saying "Uh-oh!!  Uh-oh."  She wanted me to go upstairs and get her blanket with her...
• Just yesterday she learned the word "no."  She's still trying it out, but I think it's going to be popular for her and I'm not super excited...
• She now knows the word "cheese" and "shoes."  Cheese sounds more like "cheee" and she only knows it in reference to cheese sticks, but it is super cute.  If you say the word cheese, however, and do not produce cheese she will wildly demand cheese until she gets it.  We've taken to calling it queso unless we have some for her...
• She is finally getting better about holding my hand on the way out to the car.  I don't know what it is, but she really likes running towards traffic as fast as she can! 
• Anytime I begin with the phrase "Are you supposed to be..." she immediately replys with "uh-uh" (as in no).  I don't even have to finish what I'm saying and she replies with "uh-uh," unfortunately, she doesn't usually stop what she's not supposed to be doing...
• She loves her blanket (snuggles), and must have that specific one to sleep.  Luckily we have 2 that are innerchangeable, but I still worry.  She also is a thumb-sucker and I'm now just starting to worry about that.  She only sucks to go to sleep and usually doesn't sleep with the thumb in her mouth...but ug.  We'll see how that goes...
• She loves being nude and if she gets away from me while in the nude it's really hard to try and catch her.  She's a bit of a free-spirit I guess...
• The other day it was time for her nap so I looked at her and said "It's time for babies to go to bed."  She stopped what she was playing with, grabbed her blanket, and headed up the stairs and was waiting for me, arms outstretched next to her crib.  I am so grateful she is such a good sleeper!!  She loves her sleep like we do ;)
• She loves reading-she grabs books all the time and comes and sits down on my lap with them so I'll read to her.  That's something I fondly remember my Mom doing with me and I love doing it with her!!

She is generally happy and sweet and we love her so much.  Yesterday my sister took her to play at the park and had her for several hours and I didn't know what to do at home by myself!!  I've grown so used to having her around and worrying about her I forgot what it was like to just be home by myself!!  I'm just wondering what we used to do for entertainment before she was around!! ♥

{shenanigans}: harajuku

This was such a fun shoot!!!  If you've never seen our stuff, I am a member of Silly Girls United, a crazy group of girls across the country that love to dress up and take ridiculous pictures.   This month's theme was "Harajuku Girls" and it was soo fun!!  Here are some of my faves...

I am so happy with how they turned out!!  For this shoot I was both the photographer and the editor and it was really fun to have it all come together-especially since I was so sick the entire week before we did it!!  If you want to see the full shoot-click on the link I reference above for Silly Girls-and if you want to play-sign up!!  I ♥ my silly girls!!

{jaded}: foto

I get a little jaded when it comes to foto.  I really do.  I LOVE taking pictures so much....I really, really do.  The things about it I do not love include:

• Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE now-a-days thinks that photography is the easiest thing in the world, and definitely something they should get into.
• At this point in my life, I'm totally ok with that-but I hope they are prepared for some of the following.
• Clients and all of their woes.  People often wonder why my contract is 2 pages long.  It's because of awful people.  People that cancel their weddings the last minute, people that demand that their wedding pics are done a week after their wedding is done, and people that try and re-edit or mess with my pictures.
• And nothing angers me more than re-editing my pics, or better off, trying to claim pictures I took are their own!!
• I especially love re-editing late into the night because the bride has a miniscul zit and all 300+ pics that she's in it needs to be removed.  Or the Mother doesn't like some small random thing...oh and can we edit someone else in that wasn't there?  Photoshop is just like a magic wand, right?
• Speaking of editing-I'm so tired of people wondering why it costs so much for just an hour or two of shooting time.  Your hour photoshoot is another 6-10+ hours of editing, and SOO much more if it's a wedding.  Those 200+ pics from your shoot don't edit themselves. 
• Why don't I want to just give away all the negatives?  Because you'll print them at the cheapest place you can and they'll look like crap!  That's the truth, and I don't want my name on it!
• Favorite:  business taxes.  Oh yes, the worst thing that ever happened to me.  And yes, they put a lien on your credit real fast but will not call back no matter how many messages you leave....awesome.
• Family pics are hard.  Kids cry-always.  They can't hold still, they don't want to hold still, and I don't blame them.
• And please, PLEASE put your outfits together BEFORE the 5 minutes before your family shoot.  No, bright teal is NOT an earth tone, and never, ever will be.  For some reason, lots of people have different definitions for the word "pastel" and when you say pastel, everyone but 2 may just show up in blue.  I even send out guidelines for this stuff!!

There's so many more....and they all have to deal with the all the clients that have yelled in the past...ug.  I'm so happy now that a good portion of my clientele are friends and family-it's so much easier when I love my clients.  Like I said, I'm a bit jaded-but I love my craft, and I want to continue in it-it is such a joy to be part of peoples greatest moments-births, weddings, deaths, families...I love it so much.  But please, think twice before you go on about what an easy thing it is-I've had many a late night that proves otherwise...

{gratitude}: my continual image woes...

I am so grateful for my health.  I have to keep coming back to that because after a week of being in bed I realize even more how lucky I am.  I get down on my body sometimes because it could be shorter, skinnier, clearer-skined, less curly, more round (in places), less allergic, and over-all this unrealistic picture of perfection I've made up in my mind.  Thankfully, in recent years I've begun to stand up for my body.  It carried a baby-and after months of throwing up every meal, it still went to work everyday.  It has climbed mountains, swam rivers, protected me from the cold, suffered through the heat, fed my baby and general housed my spirit comfortably and well.  And I have abused it!  I've kept it up late nights, left it out in the sun, fed it too much sugar, and bleached it's hair!! 

I guess in my ongoing struggles with my weight I have to remind myself sometimes to turn off the voice, and just be so glad that while I may be considered obese, at least I can run a flight of stairs, touch my toes, and accomplish the day-to-day tasks that I need to.  I still have a healthy beating heart, strong lungs and thick bones. 

My body is my friend and I am so grateful for it's healthiness, especially after what I've put her through. 

I think while I'm sick I'm not allowed to post anymore...

In the meantime, does anyone have some great remdies for the following ailments (for both me and Paisley)?

• Runny nose
• Cough
• Fatigue
• Mucous
• General Misery
• Cabin Fever
• Allergies
• and too much tv.

I'm just so grateful that all the seasons of Scrubs are now instant play...Netflix, I love you.

{topic}: charity

Charity never faileth.  I LOVE the Relief Society motto.  This month in our ward our focus is charity and love-we're focusing on a Christ-like attribute every month and this one is perfect for the month of February.  Perfect because of Valentine's Day, and perfect for renewing our efforts to carry charity in our hearts starting at the beginning of a new year.  I love the topic of charity.  It heals.  It brightens...so much.  It is the light that has gotten me through so many difficult times in my life.  Charity is the pure love of Christ.  Charity is striving to see others the way Christ sees them, and love them with a perfect, unconditional love.  Charity is learning to love yourself-perfectly (completely) and unconditionally-because without this love for yourself, how can you love others fully?  Charity helps see and work through pain.  Charity calms, soothes, and heals hurts, injustices, prejudices, racism, bigotry, and so many other vices. 

    

45 And charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

     46 Wherefore, my beloved brethren, if ye have not charity, ye are nothing, for charity never faileth. Wherefore, cleave unto charity, which is the greatest of all, for all things must fail—
     47 But charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him.

Moroni 7: 45-47

1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.
2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.
3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.
4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
5 Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;
6 Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;
7 Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
8 Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away.
9 For we know in part, and we prophesy in part.
10 But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away.
11 When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
12 For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.
13 And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.

1 Corinthians 13

That last verse in Corinthians 13 is what really gets me-that of Faith, Hope and Charity, Charity is the most important.  I taught Relief Society on Sunday and this was my topic and I just wanted to share it with the rest of the blogsphere.  May we all strive to hold Charity in our hearts, and Love.  Happy February ;)

{inquiry}: is it just me?

I have a couple of important life questions that I feel I need the answer to:

1. Because I have been working out, I have been showering more.  Because I have been showering more I have been breaking out more.  After a weekend of not showering my acne has cleared...and it seems that not washing my face, and not taking off my make-up seems to leave my skin happy and healthier that it is when it's clean.  Is this weird?  My first thought is that maybe I really was meant to be a hippie, but when it comes down to it I HAVE to shower after I work out because I smell.  I've tried moisturizers and gentle soaps, and no soap and it doesn't seem to matter!  Thoughts?
2. It seems that my hunger is directly proportional to the amount of exercising I do and also the amount of physical contact I have (you know, with that husband of mine).  The more I exercise, the less I want to eat (which in the case of the exercising I'm doing is BAD) and the less lovin' I get, the more I crave sweets?  Also weird?
3. Exercising is supposed to make you happy and healthy...why do I get sick every time I start a new work out?  And seriously, I don't know if it's because I'm older than I was but when does the soreness go away!!?! 
4. It seems that as my desire to go outside rises, the temperature drops...which REALLY doesn't make sense here in St. George!!  Just as I'm loving going to the park with Paisley it's ridiculously COLD outside!!
5. Why can a hobby that brings me so much joy as be accompanied by so much frustration!?!?!
6. I feel like 25 years of life in I should be pro at communicating with people but I still struggle sometimes!  Is that weird?  Is that going to be a continual life challenge because it's making me crazy!
7. And lastly, after working out for 3 weeks solid, I had not lost a pound-and I hadn't been too restrictive or too loose, but after going to a cabin, doing nothing and eating crap for an entire weekend I have finally dropped 3...

I often find myself shaking my head and wondering...

{update}: january

I feel like I need to post something because it seems like I haven't posted forever (which may be due to the fact that my last post is Christmas pictures). January was a surprisingly long month, which I don't necessarily mind, but it did seem to be longer than several of the months previous.  We're kind of running on the same old, same old routine at this point...but a couple of exciting and fun things:

• Our silly girls shoot for this month was AWESOME.  Pictures will be coming soon.
• We almost managed to make it through the month without getting sick-almost because we got sick just this last weekend.
• We had some serious fun up at the Cooper's cabin...pictures will follow.
• Jon and I were doing really, really well on most of our goals but have been sick/distracted/sidetracked and have sadly fallen right back into bad habits-today that will change!!
• Our friend Chad and I went to a Community Ed Gardening class and we laid out plans for our garden yesterday!!  He has a fairly large back yard and we are going to utilize all of his space!!  I am so excited!
• Along with the gardening we are looking into bee-keeping as well...we'll see what the official rules are in his area...
• Paisley is teething, growing, learning, and sweet as can be.  She is recovering from the worst bum rash I have ever seen, thanks to Aveeno's bum cream and some awesome Vaseline. 
• We recently took measures to protect our flat screen.  If you're wondering the best way to do that-its a quick $20 solution of plexi glass and velcro.  Most people can't even tell it's there and it has already saved our TV more than once!

I think that's about it...I've got some fun pics to post from said events so I'm sure I'll be around soon...;)