{recipes}: a very bland pot roast

So Sunday I threw a pot roast, celery, carrots and potatoes into our crock pot. I sprinkled in some salt and pepper and water and ran to work. I recieved the report from Jon later that day that my pot roast was very bland. Much too bland for his delicate palate. So the pot roast and veggies ended up in the fridge and has been chilling (literally) there since then. Not wanting to waste a perfectly bland pot roast, I formulated the following recipe. So far, it tastes pretty good, and could potentially come in handy for left over pot roast in the future.

I put olive oil, green onions and garlic in a pot on med until fragrant. I cut up the roast and veggies into chunks and threw then in the pot. I added a cup or so of lentils and around 4 cups of water. I then spooned in some remaining juices from the roast since I didn't have any bullion. I added a ton of black pepper, garlic salt and salt and a couple of pats of butter. I took my smoothie mixer thing and blended it all together in the pot, leaving a couple of chunks here and there. I neglected to take a picture because it looks a bit like throw up at this point. I left it to boil to cook the lentils and then I put some in a bowl and ripped up big chunks of hearty wheat bread to mop it up with. It is yum. I can't recommend it by the look of it, but the taste is delicious! AND not bland!

Just thought I would share.

Me & My Baby

I love this sweet little girl.

{projects}: the bedroom

After we moved to our new place (almost a year ago) we decided that we wanted to switch our comforter from the blue side to the green side. Originally we had a blue comforter, and tan sheets with matching shams I made when we were first married. We decided to opt for green comforter/chocolate brown sheets and oddly, I had a hard time finding shams I liked. So after months of checking and looking around I found this tablecloth at Target! I not only used the material for the shams but for the background in these silhouettes of Jon and I on either side of our bed!

Awww...Jon and his beard.

The floral pattern not only incorporates the green and chocolate brown, but the same blue that is the other side of the comforter and a yellow! (I like the yellow, thus the exclamation mark). Now I just need to find reasonably priced drawer pulls for our dresser and put together my new nightstand (if you notice from the picture mine is smaller. We did that on accident. We've bought each piece of furniture one at a time because we can't afford it any other way and we accidentally got 2 different sized nightstands. I want a bigger one so I can fill it with stuff!) Many of you may have gotten to know Bert, my chair from college. We brought him home from DI one day in the back of Audrey's car. I never pictured myself nursing my babies on him, but he's just so darn comfortable and ugly I can't bear to part with him. I used to wake up every morning and sit on him while I read my scriptures and ate my breakfast cereal in the middle of our kitchen back in the days of the Betty Manor. Looking at my big warm comfy bed is making me tired...I think I'm off to bed. If anyone would like to know the trick to silhouettes or sham making, feel free to call. I certainly don't consider myself an expert (I cheat and use things like zippers) but either way I'd love to help.

{rant}: family planning

This may WILDLY offend some of you. Turn away if you begin to be offended. I just need to get it out.

I have held this in for a long time. I have hesitated over and over again to even vent about this but it irritates me over an over again. I've begun to realize over the years that this is one of those "to each his own" types of things in life. It's not my responsibility, but I struggle to bite my tongue.

Family Planning. It's really a joke, and I realize that. Its rough. I watch people that desperately want to have children wait and try and wait and try and really struggle. That breaks my heart. Then there are those that stand by the "if Heavenly Father wants us to get pregnant, we will." What does that say to those that can't? Heavenly Father gave us free agency. We CHOOSE to have sex, we CHOOSE not to use anything to prevent pregnancy, and so thus, we CHOOSE to have babies. I mean really-do you think Heavenly Father wants to send babies to 14 year olds every day? It happens. I actually heard a friend of mine as she was looking at her screaming baby say "I don't know why Heavenly Father wanted us to have this baby-we can't afford it, and its really hard but we got pregnant so he must have." Science? Free Agency? God does not make your life decisions for you! I take my ability to procreate very VERY seriously. This is kind of a big deal. Jon and I have wanted to have kids for a couple years before Paisley, but we also wanted to have a way to take care of those kids. We also made the decision to use birth control between children so that we would not have 12...I don't think we could feed 12. Being a member of the LDS church they do teach that we shouldn't put off having children, but in the same breath they also say it's our decision:

When married couples are physically able, they have the privilege of providing mortal bodies for Heavenly Father’s spirit children. They play a part in the great plan of happiness, which permits God’s children to receive physical bodies and experience mortality. If you are married, you and your spouse should discuss your sacred responsibility to bring children into the world and nurture them in righteousness. As you do so, consider the sanctity and meaning of life. Ponder the joy that comes when children are in the home. Consider the eternal blessings that come from having a good posterity. With a testimony of these principles, you and your spouse will be prepared to prayerfully decide how many children to have and when to have them. Such decisions are between the two of you and the Lord.
As you discuss this sacred matter, remember that sexual relations within marriage are divinely approved. While one purpose of these relations is to provide physical bodies for God’s children,another purpose is to express love for one another—to bind husband and wife together in loyalty, fidelity, consideration, and common purpose.

taken from True to the Faith-a Gospel Reference, under the heading Birth Control

Our purpose in this life is to learn how to make the right decisions at the right time, we can't do that if God is making our decisions. I can't condemn anyone for their decision-I haven't received revelation for them. I just wish I could look around and say that everyone is honestly thinking about what they are doing. This is a commitment greater than any other. Children are so precious and special and they are yours. forever. Even the bonds of marriage can be broken, but you will ALWAYS be tied to that child. I just needed to get this off my chest. I promise I am not looking to offend. I can also look around at the many of our friends that took that leap of faith before we did and have been so blessed with such sweet babies before us. Thank you for being such a good example to us of what parenthood can be, and that it isn't so, so scary even though it's a huge responsiblility.

{infimities}: awful, awful allergies!

I *achoo am *achoo DYING! My allergies are worse than they have ever been and I don't know what to do! I've gone from the usual post nasal drip to only sleeping with my mouth wide open to breathe, swollen throat, inability to even think about wearing my contacts...ug. I hate it! In years past I have doped up on meds but I am still breastfeeding and I don't want to give it up quite yet. Breastfeeding had to become an obsession there for awhile because it's difficult to do while working 40 hours a week and now I just like it and I want to make it the full year!! Allergy meds are approved while nursing but they unfortunately dry up my milk almost immediately. Which compounds the problem because being this sick with allergies also dries up my milk which then causes Paisley to start waking up at night because she didn't get enough to eat during the day. I'm in a vicious downward spiral here. I think poor Paisley has them too. It's horrible. I've already tried eating local honey regularly, nasal sprays, humidifiers, and the like. I need help! Does anyone have any suggestions or experience with this? please help.

{technology}: is amazing

In the five minutes after we found out we needed to leave for Boise I had already checked the weather, the shortest route with top view, written directions and street view, looked at our hotel and what type of pool it had and updated my facebook status to all friends and family that we were leaving-all on my phone. If you would have told our parents ten years ago that such things were possible, and on a cell phone! they would not have believed you. technology is amazing. We only got as far as Beaver, UT in the middle of a blizzard when we found out that going to Boise was not as necessary as we had originally thought. Thank goodness. We were very worried about Jon's sister who was in the hospital with something that originally seemed very serious and turned out to be not as bad as originally thought. We're so glad she's ok. We love you Cristal.

{dreams}: somewhere only we know

It is not often that my dreams come with a soundtrack. In fact, this is the first dream I can remember music so vividly. I don't often get soo so personal in our blog, but I heard this song and couldn't help but share this. I'm starting to look to this blog as a sort of journal, and I haven't written this down-even though I don't think I'll ever forget it.

It was 3-ish years ago when I had the dream. I was at a wedding. The mother of the bride was yelling at me to help her with dishes and all sorts of other things. It was at a large victorian style house on a beach somewhere and the reception was being held in the yard. I didn't like the brides mother, in fact her yelling at me bothered me deeply. Caught up in the hustle and bustle of the kitchen and people everywhere, I realized I didn't know who the bride and groom were...so I went outside. They were standing facing away from me, but I recognized the groom. It was Jon. Next to him was a short, skinny, long-haired brunette in a huge vintage style wedding dress. In shock I ran back into the house to confirm who the groom truly was. It was Jon. My husband Jon. And in the dream, my ex-husband Jon. He had left me-I had finally yelled and screamed too much and that had been it. My dream was filled with memories of fights, arguments-both real and dreamed. It was crushing. I went to the living room, sobbing and frantic, just as her mother once again came to yell at me to get some linens. She also told me the bride and groom were about to leave. That is when the song began. I ran outside to find them. As I got there, they turned to run down the beach and Jon looked over his shoulder and mouthed the words "I'm sorry...I love you." And they were gone. Disappearing down the beach in their bare-feet her veil and dress trailing behind them. I never saw the brides face. I just knew she was the kind and patient girl I was not at the time.

And I was not a patient wife at the time. I suffered of an anger that could have easily consumed me and our marriage. Thankfully we're at a much better place and the time of my yelling and screaming has past. Every time I hear the song "Somewhere only we know" by Kean I am reminded of this dream and I quickly see my husband and this other girl running away from me on the beach. It is terrifying and causes me to tear up just talking about it. I woke up that morning bawling-there are very few things in my life that have so violently grabbed and shaken me.

{giggles}: april, the pioneer

Last night as we were unloading a couple groceries for an Easter Picnic, I noted that I was carrying a very heavy load and could have totally been a pioneer woman. The following comments proceeded from Jon (in his best April voice):

• Oh no! I have a rash *waaa* I can't go on...(because of my recent arm rash)
• Oh no...I have *Achoo* allergies...this is too hard *Achoo*
• What?!? No chocolate...I have no reason to live...
• And no cookies? *Achoo* I think my rash just got worse...
• Ooooo...there's a bump on my foot...I'm going to die...*whine*
• *Achoo* This is too heavy...will you carry it?

He continually makes fun of me in my infirmities...as you can see. I was laughing so hard I started to tear...Oh how I love my rotten husband.

{photography}: a new blog

Click here to check out my new photography blog!
It was time. And I am so excited for this. It's just for fun. I will miss working all the time with Rachel (We've recently divorced and are currently working out custody). I feel like Rachel and I were constantly trying to prove ourselves-I don't know, it could have just been me, what do you think Rach? But I don't want to take it so seriously this time around. This isn't a business. This is just me taking pictures because I love, love, love to take pictures and I want to share. What Rachel and I did with Amelie is still so incredible to me because in a few short years we went from nothing to a legitimate business and contender in the St George Wedding Photography market. But it took a lot of time and blood, sweat & tears and with kids and jobs we just can't keep up with it anymore. So we say goodbye to Amelie and hello to a new beginning of a hobby and talent that I love. Enjoy!

The Coopers: St. George, UT Family Photographer

I love spring blossoms! And such a gorgeous orchard with a gorgeous family!

{scoot-scoot}: pros & cons

Now that spring has sprung here in St George, and I refuse to drive the bus, I am back to driving the scooter. Oh how I wish it was this cute scooter, but alas, it is not. It is a ridiculous racing scooter from Spain that looks much better on Jon than me.

Either way, scooter riding is really quite fun during the spring but it has it's pros and cons:

• Pro: It IS really nice outside.
• Con: If you think bugs on your windshield are annoying, bugs in your lip gloss is way, way worse.
• Pro: I get like 90 miles to the gallon.
• Con: Not that it matters too much with my hair, but I wear a helmet and continuously have helmet hair.
• Pro: As a chick walking out into the dark mall parking lot at night, no one wants to mess with you when they see that helmet-even if it is to ride a scooter.
• Con: rain.
• Pro: You get to smell, taste and see more of the environment around you. Golden Corral smells delicious in the morning (when they bake their rolls) and cemeteries are extra creepy because even during the warmest days, its cooler when you drive past them.
• Con: Instead of looking super cute, I wear a bulky helmet, pants under my skirt, random hoodies and usually a pair of dress shoes (that look ridiculous with the pant-skirt combination).
• Pro: I really am a better driver.
• Con: People try to run you over a lot.
• Pro: You gain heightened skills like swerving good.
• Con: When you do crash, you will get hurt. Even when I laid mine down going slow I still got really ripped up.
• Pro: There really is nothing like riding a scooter.

{thoughts}: little girls

What happens to litttle girls? It is so interesting to see the difference between the 10 and 11 year olds that still have confidence in themselves and the 13 and 14 year olds that are a mess. What happens to us? It's horrible! As a girl in Junior High you are either picking on other girls and bratty as can be or being picked on by bratty girls. I was picked on. It was awful. I don't want Paisley to go through it! Working at Bath & Body I have droves of girls come in and they are horrible! It is a rare day that I have a nice, decent, confident but not too confident 13 year old shop at my store...and it makes me sad. So what happens in those few short years? I look back and we get through it ok...for the most part. I'm still a bit scarred, but they're only scars...I'm ok now. I just don't want Paisley to go through it in the first place...

{nostalgia}: love story

On Friday, Jon and I will be married for 5 years, and I can't even believe it. Here is our story in pictures:

I was a lifeguard, working at Reinhart, tan and skinny as can be.

I also drove a scooter-which is particularly bizarre in Idaho.

Jon played guitar, and had a band. He's playing here with Curtis at Curtis' Wedding.

Jon cut weeds...which gave him some sweet are muscles. Oddly enough, he also drove a scooter in Idaho.
Jon and I met on May 17, 2004 in our Institute class. I like him right away. He had cool pants, I had cool shoes, and we both drove cool scooters...it was magic. The first time we hung out, outside of class was at a party where the above pic was taken. We had our first date on July 28th and our first kiss on August 7th...right before I was about to leave for school...
The first time Jon came to St. George to visit me we went to Sand Hollow. I had fallen for him, but run off to St George anyway, and he promised he would visit every 2 weeks.

He kept his promise and moved down in December of 2004. We went to California...and In-n-Out...
We got married March 12, 2005 in the Idaho Falls Temple. I wore chucks, and Jon's cool socks had orange and blue stripes-once again we are very fashionable...

Our reception was organized chaos...and quite the party.

We lived in "the stilts" and I am happy to say we are no longer there...

Thankfully during our time there our decorating got better and better but when we first moved we had a random assortment of armed chairs, a hideous loveseat (pictured above with the material covering it) and my grandparents old couch (they died, it was passed on to us and we still have and love it!)

Any excuse to go to California, and we go!

This was the first family pictures taken with Jon as part of the "Clark Family"

Vegas

You'll notice my hair color change a lot through the years...

Califonia

Rachel's Wedding, 2007

The Scion, also a souvenir from California!

Family Pictures, 2008

Mexico!

Pregnancy, 2009

Cinco De Mayo, 2009 and pregnant.

Washington County Fair-they wouldn't let me go on the rides because of "my condition." Just because I was 9 months pregnant!

Our Family, 2009

I love this man! I don't remember my life without him, but it seems like we were just married yesterday! Five years has gone by so fast, and I am so grateful to have him with me through all of them. I love to look at Paisley and think of her as a product of our love...she is and she's the best thing we have to show for all these years :)

{spoiled}

I have been wanting to blog for so long because there is so much to write about, but it just hasn't happened. I'm feeling very spoiled and very ungrateful at the moment, and I'm really struggling with it. Spring is always hard on me-I always love it, St. Patricks Day, all the birthdays, and Easter, but the barometric pressure changes due to roaming thunderstorms kill my joints (yes, I'm an old lady who did too much ballet for her own good), and the allergies come in with full force. Which means for me a sore grump with a non stop sinus headache and post nasal drip. This is also typically when I suffer my burn out for the year, and unfortunately this year is no different. Christmas is never a relaxing time for us, particularly when I'm working in retail so instead of going into the new year well rested, or really rested at all it feels like we just got done running a marathon just to begin a new one. And poor Jon...oh I ache for him! School is going to end his life! He is desperately trying to survive these last 3 classes...he told me he doesn't want a birthday party this year-but he wants to save and have a HUGE and crazy Graduation party. I agreed wholeheartedly. So I am out working my 40 a week trying to hang out with Paisley as much as I can, he is in working his 20-40, school, and taking care of Paisley most of the time and we are barely surviving. I feel like I've been in survival mode since I went back to work. I just want to cook, clean, repair, hang out with my child and be a housewife! I shouldn't feel so picked on that I just have to work right now in order for us to survive, but leaving her lately has been so hard. And she keeps growing. She's going to crawl and I'm going to be at work, and she's going to walk and I'm going to be at work, and it makes me cry. a lot. And I know, how spoiled are we that Jon gets to be the one home with her, and I love my job. If I could choose anything that took me away from my baby, at least it's something I love as much as Bath & Body Works. But its just hard. I don't know if all you housewives out there know how blessed you are. We've tried to survive off of what Jon makes, and we just can't. Hopefully someday soon we can. I don't mind being poor, but I do mind living off the government, and currently that is what we would have to do. I hate being judged because I'm working and on top of it working Sundays, but at the same time I can't feel good about staying home and living off everyone else. All of this has been rattling around in the back of my mind, which doesn't help the sinus headache. Sorry I'm a downer. I need to get past this point and things will be better. I just can't wait til jons done with school...oh what a beautiful day that will be.

(Paisley): among other things...

I am excited to say I am writing this post from my phone...which is new. Also, Paisley has become mobile and if I can figure it out, a picture will soon follow...